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"No great mind has ever existed without a touch of madness." -Aristotle

Drunken Group of Women Cause Chaos, Karaoke Program to Close

2/17/2016

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Saturday night at the Kindersley Inn Pub is usually full of laughter and light-hearted local singers looking to have a fun filled night. But on February 13, 2016, karaoke in the small, quiet town was in total shambles.
According to patrons, a group of four middle aged, attractive, slightly inebriated women walked into the pub that was hosting Saturday night karaoke. After ordering a round of “doubles”, the shortest and loudest one of the group demanded to sing her “jam”.

*Gord Lonechild, who was operating and hosting Karaoke that night, reported “…I didn’t really have a choice. This girl just grabbed the microphone and told me that I was lucky to witness what she was about to do. So I just hit play and let her have at it.”

Patrons said that her first performance was surprisingly enjoyable. Next up was another one of the group. After downing her two-thirds full drink in one gulp, she walked up to the mike and dedicated her song to “all the boys who can’t get with this”. Again, patrons said the performance was quite good, and were looking forward to more.
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That’s when things took a turn for the worse. The group of women (after taking shots and selfies for a few moments) started challenging the other patrons to a sing-off. Understandably intimidated, the patrons declined with one saying, “there was NO way I was going to get up there with them. They were getting a little violent and inappropriate.”
When no one would accept their challenge, the four women turned on Lonechild, with one of them wrapping the microphone cord around his neck while the other three kicked over his audio equipment.

“The damage is beyond repair, I’m afraid we have to shut down karaoke for the time being.”

When questioned the next day, the oldest and therefore most responsible member of the violently talented group of women stated, “My friends are perfect, and if you say otherwise I will burn your house down and tell your kids what you really do on the weekends."
Touché Madame.
​-JD
*Names have been changed to protect identities

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