Local women *Verla Caltrain and *Bernice Buckingham have made a shocking and globally transforming alternative fuel discovery in their very own backyards.
Caltrain stated that they "...figured that the naturally occurring anaerobic decomposition in area feline carcasses contained just as high, if not higher rates of carbon as ancient buried fossils." Buckingham furthered with, "The difference is, feline carcasses are easily accessible within our area and lift costs are next to zero."
It is unclear whether the carcasses are retrieved after the time of death, or if the area felines meet their demise at the hands of the notoriously private duo.
The humble pair made no mention of the impact they have made on lowered crime rates and unnecessary tax dollars being spent on investigations surrounding the FCS (Feline Crimelords of Saskatchewan). The FCS has been fingered in over 34 crimes across the RMs of Winslow, Snipe Lake, Mariposa, and of course Oakdale. The alleged crimes include, but are not limited to: Failure to Comply With a Firearms Prohibition, Possession of Property Obtained by Crime, Grand Theft Auto, and Aggravated Assault Upon Self Due to Congenital Brain Defects (not punishable by law due to patheticism of the crime).
Caltrain and Buckingham have not released their mutually discovered extraction and formulation process due to concerns over superfluous fame and fortune.