Healthcare professionals in the Kindersley region are preparing for a busy June, as a new study has directly linked the annual Goose Festival held in September to an influx of pregnant women among the local population. Doctors and nurses have been working around the clock in preparation for what many refer to as a deeply disturbing ordeal.
"It's the same thing every year," said one bewildered nurse, "It's like the entire community gets together for one weekend in September and then nine months later, BAM! Babies everywhere!"
"This is really quite fascinating," claims Dr. Lance Preshovski, who funded and authored the study.
"A majority of the women are unable to identify who the father is based on three determining factors: the amount of liquor consumed, the similitary of attire worn by the male population of the community, and the poor lighting behind the West Central Events Centre."
A local health care worker (who wishes to retain their anonymity) expressed disgust over the situation. "It's just gross. How is it possible all these guys wearing Rock Revival jeans and Fox Racing t-shirts are actually getting laid?"
The Kindersley Health Region quickly responded to the study by releasing a public service announcement reminding community members that the best way to avoid unplanned pregnancy is to abstain from intercourse, or to visit one of the many local pharmacies to obtain the contraception that best suits your lifestyle and level of promiscuity.